I feel like so many things are running through my head. A lot of what ifs, some possibilities and way too many worse case scenarios. I have been quite slowly, adjusting back to campus life which, unfortunately, includes too many classes. It’s good to be back with friends and the planning of more adventures but a lot is on my mind and it can be really hard to sit in joy in my current present.

I feel like I keep running into obstacles. Just little road bumps but enough of them and your brakes start to wear down. It can be really overwhelming but God used this time to stop me on my road & then He wanted to make sure these obstacles were clearly in my way. I feel like sometimes we run into things and think oh I can do this and problem solve. But as soon as there are too many and you can’t handle it yourself then you call on God.

Well God wants to make sure I start with Him instead of viewing Him as a last minute resort. 

I read in Jesus Calling today “Depending only on me can feel like walking on a tight rope, but there is a safe net underneath: the everlasting arms.” 

I am just trying to fully meditate on this right now. 

I understand the walking on a tightrope. The balancing act of juggling all of life’s expectations with my own and then some. I am in a position where complete trust is necessary to keep moving forward because I can’t see where I am suppose to be going. 

I feel like sometimes when we are in a place like this we begin dreaming of the best case scenarios. If I make it to the end of the semester I can get my own apartment. Or If I could just get this job I will be more motivated to work from 9 to 5. We begin to take steps towards those goals and we stop looking at all of the possibilities.

I was doing this. I was limiting my view thus limiting how God was going to work. 

But I realized this. I stopped just looking at the next step on the tightrope and began looking around. The thing is when we accept the truth that God really is in control and that He is working out a plan for us if we would just allow Him to work, there is peace. This is the best thing to have access to especially when facing those unavoidable infinite amount of speed bumps. 

The road bumps don’t last forever but whoever is in your passenger seat can make the trip more fun. 

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